I STINK!
Wednesday, May 13, 2009
Tuesday, May 12, 2009
It's Alive
Yes, I'll start blogging more.
Yes, I've been preoccupied with a different activity.
No, I'm not ready to focus on my weight.
Yes, I should be because man I feel fat.
No, I have not started smoking again.
Yes, I'm on my way toward 2 months.
but, I've also been under the weather for the past few days so I'm not feeling terribly motivated. Especially because you don't need to know those details.
Sunday, May 3, 2009
Health Assessment
Age: 43 (up from last year, good thing too)
Height: 5'8" (same as last year)
Weight: 265 lbs. (up from last year)
Blood Pressure: 134/82 (similar to last year)
I got my blood drawn as well. Those vampires better say that I'm a non-smoker like they did last year. Last year I was a HUGE smoker and they said I was not. I had to fight to get them to say I was to get the lowest score possible. Needed room for improvement. Not sure how much I improved even though I quit smoking. The weight is up and the age is up. They use it all against you.
I'll keep you informed as I need to start focusing on the waist-line. ...And people thought I have been a bitch from quiting smoking... lol.
Wednesday, April 29, 2009
Tabula Rasa
I'm all yawns today.
I woke up from a full night of insomnia.
Tuesday, April 28, 2009
Superheroes like me
Monday, April 27, 2009
Saturday, April 25, 2009
Excuses
Yesterday/last evening, I had wanted to mow the lawn but created plenty of obstacles not to do that work. It could definitely wait for the cool Saturday morning air.
Saturday morning cool air wasn't so cool and I woke up with neck pain. I really did! Not sure how I slept to do that. But whatever I did, I must have been in a really kinked up position because I had to have been cutting off the blood flow. My left arm was puffed up and my hand looked like it was suffering an allergic reaction. It's still a little sore (the hand) but the puffiness has gone down and the hand is back to normal.
But still, my neck is all crickey and hurts. Pain is a wonderful excuse not to mow the lawn. But I could do without the pain.
Friday, April 24, 2009
Finish Him!
Oh yeah, I'm toast!
I ran out of energy around 9am.
The machine that I am, was running on fat fumes I suppose.
Mowing the lawn was on my agenda after work.
But then I had to stay late.
Then I had to run a few errands.
Followed-up by some Solomonster time.
Running into darkness.
You don't suppose I planned it that way, do you.
Crap, now I have to get up really early on a Saturday.
The lawn really needs a cutting and it's going to be 90 degrees tomorrow.
I don't mind heat, but I do not want it in April.
Alright Dr. Flab, where are you?
Thursday, April 23, 2009
Sigmund and the Sea Monsters
I broke out my old pair of Phat-Man pants to wear to work, just to feel comfortable.
I wasn't slightly bothered by the fact that they are OLD, a little less than casual and worn looking. They felt awesome today and my bloated whale self was able to glide its fat ass into the bucket seat at work. Damn thing has no lumbar support. It's like working, sitting in a chair, that acts like a hammock but you can't nap.
Jail. I might as well have been in jail today.
*waves some burning sage around to discern the size and scope of the real Mr. Cranky Pants that is possessing my body.
This is a stress test. I know it is. And I don't want a cigarette.
NO!
Wednesday, April 22, 2009
PMS
This week I feel really fat - I am.
This week I feel like I have male PMS.
My emotions are out of control.
Yet, I always feel frisky and playful.
Tell me that picture doesn't give that description a fair amount credence. But just assume that Cat-Woman has a penis and no boobs. Then we're at least on shakier ground. I think I need to up my head-med a bit this weekend, just a tad.
Tuesday, April 21, 2009
Monday, April 20, 2009
Yin and Yang
Man this stuff is sticky and likes to cling.
Sunday, April 19, 2009
Friday, April 17, 2009
Not Quite Ti-GG-ER
This week was draining.
I'm not sure I have bounce left.
I'll give it one more try.
Why don't you join me?
Bouncey Bounce!
Weeeee - The best spot on earth.
My dream machine majik pillows.
Night Ya'll!
Thursday, April 16, 2009
Wednesday, April 15, 2009
Kryptonite
But very sneaky did enter something that is just as sinister to my health. Who cares, it's only one. No problem it's small. Not to worry, what harm can it do you if you don't do it that often? Yes folks, I have been succumbing to my own personal kryptonite every once in a while. You know it's a nefarious foe when one became two became four became eight.
Sugar in it's many forms. Bad candy. oh but such sweet carboliciousness. And it's been a dastardly enemy fogging up the impact of not getting my nicotine. So today, no-wait - tomorrow, rrrrr - maybe Friday - I'll have my last jelly bean for a while. I need to not only work out the remaining Nico-Demons, but now I need to face the CarboHydra.
I need my own Dr. Flab fone... Hey the Batman had one!
Mine will be yellow *green* yellow *green* YELLOW *Green*
***Hey, get your own blog***
Tuesday, April 14, 2009
Pokemon: Kabutops
Monday, April 13, 2009
Puny Human
Sunday, April 12, 2009
What?
I'll have to think about this some more.
Oh, and be very glad you didn't hang with me this weekend.
The body odor was just kicking in high gear.
I sure hope it's a one-off sort of thing and not just my nose being over sensitive. I'd hate to think that THAT'S how I smell all the time and was just not aware of it. Shower's helped but only for so long. We'll see.
Saturday, April 11, 2009
Australia
Friday, April 10, 2009
Chunky Butt
I'm holding him personally responsible for global warming, or more specifically Richmond warming. His punk-ass brought near 80 degree weather to Richmond, Virginia today. We haven't had enough time to recuperate from Winter, let alone jump right into Summer temperatures. Give it a rest you blue-faced freak. I want Spring. I want to be able to slide on into breezy cool temperatures. I want sunshine, light rains and the opportunity to do yard work. I want clean up my property without having to sweat may butt off. It's your fault Planet that the weeds are overtaking my yard. It's your fault that the evil Holly bush in my front flower bed won't die. It's your fault that huge-ass tree had to be sawed out from the middle of a bush and paired down, as it tries to grow up through my concrete front porch. You're a menace Captain Planet. I just quit smoking and your acting like a closeted gay physical trainer taking all your aggressions out on the fat kid. Well I'll tell you something; it's not going to be pretty. Because sooner rather than later, this chunky butt is going to lay some muscle on your ass.
Special thanks to friend Wayne, playing the role of He-Man!Thursday, April 9, 2009
Moon Knight
Not to worry, true believers. I was triumphant! Excelsior!!!
Wednesday, April 8, 2009
Hawkman
Elevator jail found me and the ghosts of women's powdery floral over exaggerated and over indulged "don't I smell pretty" crap. Some dude's maple syrup laden breakfast burning in the microwave in the community kitchen was just dandy. And my personal morning favorite was torturous person that nuked up some bacon in the microwave. And they did it wonderfully well, to the point that the intoxicating aroma waifed all the way directly under my nose. mmmmm bacon.
I'm still taking my breaks with my smoking friends. That is going well but yesterday and today, the burning embers smelled like burning leaves. Well okay, that is what they are, but it didn't smell *welcoming* at all.
Took my car to a glass shop and met a nice guy that I would like to smell better. ummm I mean see again when the time to fix my window arrives. But for now he flexed his muscles and smiled, rrrrr I mean fixed my window to working okay until I get the money to have it repaired. It was so nice of him to oil me up - oh, the window linings. Even the oil had a "take me" kind of smell to it.
After I returned from lunch I needed to be in various locations throughout the building. All I smelled, and I didn't have a choice, was everyone Else's lunch. And I swear today was International Food Fare day. But a word of caution if you ever have a hyper-sensitive olfactory experience happening.
AVOID - Hold it - pinch as hard as you have too - but don't go into the men's bathroom!
Oh -- and I selected Hawkman today because of his enormous schnoz!
Tuesday, April 7, 2009
Cloak and Dagger
I had the thought today that the Lexapro/Cetalopram (drug to help keep me from slapping "them") and the Chantix (drug for smoking cessation) that I have been taking are causing a side effect. I've actually been having the thought for a while. I'm not fatigued. I'm sleepy. I'm not tired. I'm yawning and stretchy. Which made me think of two of my favorite Marvel comic Characters, both dependent upon the other. One more so dependent upon the other. Cloak, the one that is created from the "darkforce dimension" (nicotine) needs Dagger (the light) to calm his hunger. Oddly enough, they are a crime fighting duo that specializes in defeating the drug community. hmmm where are my pills?
Monday, April 6, 2009
Fighting Fire with Fire
Sunday, April 5, 2009
Saturday, April 4, 2009
The Brain
Friday, April 3, 2009
Lung Cleansing
Thursday, April 2, 2009
Side Effect
Day 5 of being smoke free went well.
Side effects of Chantix, not so well.
Wednesday, April 1, 2009
Everything Burns
Tuesday, March 31, 2009
Fuzzy Tongue
pendt
da
dae
mid
Futhy
Tung
Translation: I spent the day with fuzzy tongue.
Having quit smoking before, I am familiar with this sensation. Other people don't know what I'm talking about. Most other people don't smoke Menthol cigarettes. I have been a menthol smoker since college. That's more than 20 years now. I used to smoke Marlboro Reds, but migrated over to Menthol because everyone was bumming' smokes. That did the trick. No one wanted to smoke menthol. Yuk, no way. Heck I enjoyed the cool ashy breeze billowing down my throat. Who the hell knows what it was doing to my tongue to make it feel fuzzy, possibly numb. It's like, or actually is, my tongue going through withdrawal. It's actually funny, odd, intriguing sensation. It also sucks that it's a reminder of what my tongue wants. I can think of better things though.
Monday, March 30, 2009
DreamScape Battle
To defeat The Swirl, it has taken a divide an conquer approach. Dr. Flab begins with separating himself into the two halves of his mind. As usual, to defeat The Swirl, time and patience is key. This battle will not end soon.
Sunday, March 29, 2009
Embers Be Gone!!
Dr. Flab is well and will soon complete one day in celebration of his defeat of Nick O'Tine and his dreaded death army.
Saturday, March 28, 2009
Reasons to Quit Smoking
- yadda yadda yadda - all the health reasons.
- Saving money.
- Wrinkles.
- The stink.
- The dust.
- Smoking to stay thin. Which is a LIE.
- Healthier nails.
- Sweeter breath.
- Self Confidence.
Friday, March 27, 2009
Smoking Cessation: Chantix
Thursday, March 26, 2009
Wednesday, March 25, 2009
Dr. Flab
Dr. Flab is a blend of two characters from two universes. Dr. Fate from the DC Comic and The Blob from the Marvel Comic Universes. The former is a good guy, the later is the bad guy. Suffice it to say that Dr. Fate will represent the intellectual well meaning portion of my psyche in combat with my inner and outer Blob. I plan to use this extension of myself to focus the Dr. Fate to proactively impact the Blob nature. I'll post about my health, goals, challenges, and topics of interest. Feel free to comment as I follow this path to wellness. I'll succeed and I'll fail, but I will continue forward. Join me if you like.