Lung Cleansing

20 minutes after my last cigarette, my blood pressure and pulse rate drop to normal and the body temperature of my hands and feet increase to normal.

87 pulsars for one minute. That's low for me. My father (non-smoker) and I generally have fast pulse rates. Last time at the doctor's office I was 121 pulses each minute and he freaked out. So maybe the smoking was making MY pulse rate really fast. Or maybe I'm just really calm right now.

8 hours after my last smoke, the carbon monoxide levels decrease and oxygen levels in my blood increase to normal.

We'll just assume this one is accurate.

24 hours after my last cigarette, I substantially lessen my chances of having a heart attack.

Well I suppose as substantial for a fat man as they can be.

2 days after my last cigarette, I should notice that my ability to taste and smell is enhanced.

The fuzzy tongue is fading and I think that hindered the psychedelic tasting trip that I should be on. But the smelling has definitely picked up on a lot of funk around me, especially at work.

3 days later my breathing should be noticeably better because my lung capacity will be greater.

I have noticed that I'm not as snotty and my sinuses are getting devoid of oysters. There's a visual for you.

2 weeks to 3 months after quitting, my circulation should improve and my lung functioning should increase up to 30%.

I'll let my diabetic feet be the judge of that. But it is possible that my pulse rate is an indication of that.

1 month to nine months, the cilia in my lungs will regenerate, allowing my body to clean my lungs and reduce infection.

Not only that, ...those little cilia should be flagellating.

Side Effect

Day 5 of being smoke free went well.
Side effects of Chantix, not so well.

Embers Be Gone!!

Dr. Flab began his epic battle with the dreaded Nick O'tine during last nights episode of Saturday Night Live. With a burning cigarette in between his lips he grabbed the last remaining pack in his house. There were eight sticks still remaining. Staring at him like pawns in a chess game with the Queen neatly positioned and smoking, as if to say "Check Mate". With his Chantix armor and every bit of willpower within; Flab attacked the eight pawns first and quickly broke them at their filtered ends and crushed them at the center core. But the burning Queen still had half her energy and conjured her magic to the bitter end. But Flab would not be defeated and he grabbed the Queen by her butt and crushed her head into the metal cauldron of ash. The Queen was defeated. And Flab would need to rest from his battle and entered into a mystical coma of healing and recuperation.

Dr. Flab is well and will soon complete one day in celebration of his defeat of Nick O'Tine and his dreaded death army.

Reasons to Quit Smoking

1. yadda yadda yadda - all the health reasons.
2. Saving money.
3. Wrinkles.
4. The stink.
5. The dust.
6. Smoking to stay thin. Which is a LIE.
7. Healthier nails.
8. Sweeter breath.
9. Self Confidence.

And one the best reasons, is in consideration of my dog. I admit I have given much thought to the second hand smoke impact on him. Oh I've been a bad daddy.